D’OH: a doughnut, a female with a doughnut, RAY: the guy who buys me doughnuts?

I MADE DOUGHNUTS.

I’ve had a mild obsession with doughnuts all my life. Which intensified after I started watching Dexter. There’s just something about those adorable pink boxes filled with DELICIOUS yeasty rings of glory. So I went to Tim Horton’s more often in an attempt to satisfy my cravings. But it just wasn’t doing it for me. Then the season ended and my needs waned. Years later, and a mere month ago, I went to New York with the wonderful boyfriend, and I remembered that Americans love their doughnuts, and what better place to find a delicious doughnut than New York?

Through a series of fun friend-fueled happenstances I ended up at a vegan BBQ on a rooftop in Brooklyn asking a friend of a friend where to find good doughnuts, and she recommended this place called Dough. It’s on the corner of Layfayette and Franklin in Brooklyn, and about a 30 minute walk from my friend’s place. That night I dreamt that I didn’t get to go to the doughnut store before we left Brooklyn. It was pretty much the WORST DREAM OF MY LIFE. It needed to not come true, because I WAS GOING TO EAT ME SOME DOUGHNUTS.

So I dragged my gracious friend and my tired and sweaty WB on a pilgrimage in the 30+ heat for these doughnuts. And I’d do it again. Oh I’d do it again if it was a billionty degrees and I had no shoes and had to piggyback everyone and they were both crying and throwing pebbles at me. At $2 a doughnut some may balk at the price point, but not only are these babies gargantuan, but I’d happily pay $5 for the pleasure of shoving them in my face-hole.

THESE DOUGHNUTS ARE MY MECCA.

I have never tasted a better doughnut in my life. It was like eating a cloud. A delicious, sweet, beautiful baby cloud.

These doughnuts were the closest thing to perfection I have ever encountered. A simple, beautiful, fluffy, yeasty doughnut with glaze. My glaze was blood orange flavoured. The tartness of the blood orange melded beautifully with all the sugar required to actually make a glaze, and it just enveloped the giant, soft doughnut so perfectly.

THIS IS WHY PEOPLE WRITE GREAT LOVE SONGS.

I finally understand!

So, as you can tell I became a woman obsessed, with doughnuts forever on my mind, waxing lyrical about my brief encounter with these supernaturally-delicious, fried circles of joy.

And as a side-effect I have ruined my pallet for all other inferior doughnuts. It’s like going back to Starbuck’s coffee after upgrading to, well, anything else. It’s just gross and disappointing. So the fate of my eternal happiness now falls in my own hands, I must make my own doughnuts. A daunting task for two reasons, the first being the last time I tried to fry anything I set my kitchen on fire, and the second being I have no idea what ingredients make for a good doughnut. There were so many different recipes out there I had no idea where to start, it confused me. Some called for potatoes, some for buttermilk, others for super simple dough ingredients. It took me a while before I went back to my favourite baking blog, remembering that she too had a doughnut quest, and I used her recipe that she found in Gourmet magazine.

And HOT DAMN are these some fine doughnuts. And totally fun to make! I didn’t burn down my kitchen at all. Though I’d recommend NOT frying anything minutes before 15 people show up to your non air-conditioned apartment in 30 degree weather… WOW was it ever steamy at my place.

Here I am wearing my fabulous present from Dave and Joanne with my doughnuts. How apropos.

 

Some tweaks are needed here and there I think, but I’m super happy that I am on my way to finally finding the perfect doughnut.

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm doughnuts.